love me some chai tea

Dear unknown man in chip and pepper jeans ad,

I want to hold your hand and listen to bonnie prince billy under a bridge somewhere as the ocean slowly rolls in to the hums of the subtle music surrounding us. I would make you breakfast everyday. I would make sure you had suitable doo-dads for your hats. I would weara an apron as I made you cakes on sundays and make sure you put sunscreen on when we went to the beach. I want to dance until the wee hours of the night and fall asleep in your arms.

that's not creepy right??

anyways...

While editing the downloaded material on my work computer today, I found this lovely photo. I must have laughed for at least 5 minutes..how does one acquire this view? Sinkhole view. And it also reminds me of a news story I heard like a month ago about a woman being trapped to her toilet. She sat on that damn thing for so long her skin became fused to the seat! First of all, she obviously had mental problems if she didn't leave the bathroom ever, it could have been fear, laziness, or something we dont even know about! some weird phobia i bet. Why would you want to stay in there? EW.so much bacteria.I saw a picture and that bathroom was not one that you'd want to be stuck in...She apparently had a boyfriend that took care of her and brought her food and washed her. That's love. I would tell her to get her fat ass off the seat and make her own tuna roll. The boyfriend didn't call for help until enough time went by for her skin to fuse to the seat! Why did he wait so long??? She kept telling him, "Maybe tomorrow I can get out of here...we'll see"..... BITCH GET OUT OF THE BATHROOM! I HAVE TO TAKE A SHIT AND I'M SICK OF GOING IN THE GARDEN!

In my mind was raised a few questions: obviously the first is about sex, she was sitting on a toilet seat for more than a few months..obviously that went out the window, yet the boyfriend respected her want to be half clad on a shitter. He aided and abedded her sickness instead of getting her help. Why didn't he dump her? he was basically acting as a geriatric nurse to someone who wasn't even giving it up.... Second question, how did they fuse the toilet seat off? did she have surgery? when she goes to the beach in the summer will she have to explain her "toilet mark legs" to inquisitors? will she be embarrassed or proud? Third question: WHERE DID THE BOYFRIEND GO TO THE BATHROOM???

And some other random thoughts having nothing to do with anytyhing:

***UNIQUE-LA is this saturday and sunday dec 13 and 14 on e 9th st downtown.....you should goooo!!!!! check it out at www.uniquela.com

***Foundation art show is dec 13th at approx 6 pm on La Cienega

***Dec 13 Kill city on Melrose is having a party! drinkie poooos and buy some jeans

***Stella stand up comedy is happening dec 13th at 8pm at the Orpheum Theatre